Tips and Tricks for Saving Water
by TardisInWonderland
Summary: River hates it in that blasted computer core, but what's she going to do? I've been trying to figure out how to get her out of there for a long time. This is how River finally gets her happy ending. CURRENTLY ABANDONED DUE TO CHANGES IN THE WHONIVERSE.
1. How to Save Your Water from a Drought

_This is the story of how River and the Doctor finally get their happy ending. It is recommended that you read "The Rain and the River" and "Raindrops on Roses" first, but it's not necessary. It just might clear up a couple of non-plot-essential "Huh?" moments. _

Nothing.

Happens.

Nothing ever happens.

Not anymore.

Not in the library.

Not in that blasted computer core with nothing but peace in the big mansion and grounds that seemed to stretch forever, though she really knew every inch of them and knew where the digital boundaries were- you took a step and ended up on the other side of the grounds, like you'd gone too far and had been reset from the other side. She had to get out of here, back to the Doctor. Back to _her_ Doctor. Back to her Raina, her child. Back to her _life_.

Some nights she would cry, others she wouldn't at first, but upon waking her face would be wet with the tears of forgotten dreams, like acid on her skin, like salt rubbed in an open wound. Donna had been here, she'd gotten out. Why? What was the difference between her and River?

She had a body, and River did not. Donna had a physical self to return to; if River was exported out she would be nothing more than a data stream, a consciousness with nowhere to go. According to Charlotte, the little girl who in a sense was the computer, said that any physical body would be able to accept her consciousness, but that would be like jamming two brains inside their head, and River wasn't about to do that to anyone.

Then one day, she had a thought.

Just a spark, just a very, very tiny idea, but maybe it would be enough. What if it wasn't her brain jammed into someone else's mind- what if it was her own? She remembered an adventure a very, very long time ago- one with Jack Harkness. They knew each other well by then, and he'd asked for a DNA sample, which she gave. She never found out why. A plan was beginning to form in the back of her mind.

"Charlotte?" She called into the hallway of the huge house, "Are you here?" The girl stepped out from one of the rooms.

"Yes?" River came up to her.

"Is there any way you can send a message to someone outside?" She asked. Charlotte nodded.

"The Doctor?" River shook her head.

"No. Another old friend." The girl led her into a room that was kept locked to the rest of the computer core's residents. Inside was a giant computer, nearly a mirror image of the one in the physical library.

"Tell me who, but first tell me why." She said. River took a deep breath.

"A long time ago, a very good friend of mine took a DNA sample from me, and I think I know what it's for now." Charlotte's usually calm and passive face changed almost imperceptibly, a movement indicating confusion.

"A body?" River nodded, not daring to hope- to dream- that she was right.

"If I remember he was working on technology called the Flesh. Very advanced, a way of creating a replica of life, an exact copy of an original. Only, they're Flesh, not human."

"Or Time Lady." Charlotte said. River nodded; she'd told Charlotte most of her story.

"Or Time Lady. But, if he used that DNA sample and made a copy of me as I was, then brought her here…"

"Then it wouldn't be two brains in one head. It would be yours and the extra copies of the memories would be deleted."

"Exactly." Charlotte seemed to think it might work, and called Jack Harkness on videophone for River.

"River Song?" Jack asked, incredibly confused. "Is it…?" River nodded.

"That DNA sample you took all those years ago? Time to put it to work." Jack saluted.

"What are my coordinates?" He asked. River had to give him a time and a date to bring herself to so that the Shadows wouldn't still be attacking, and she did so very accurately. They never came to the computer core, they were too afraid of the immense light that shone from it which tended to burn the creatures alive.

"Just… one thing, Jack." He raised his eyebrows. "Make sure it's her- my- choice. We'll be sharing all our memories- basically the ones I have now plus whatever happens between the time she's… erm… created and the time she comes here." He nodded.

"What if she says no?" Jack asked, a little concerned.

"Let's try not to think about that, shall we?"

"River." Jack needed an answer- for all their sakes. River sighed.

"Then I would rather die than live like this." It was true. She couldn't stand it. This bloody boring computer core and this blasted not-quite-life where nothing ever changed. The rest of the crew were content not to die, but she had seen so much more… she wanted to see so much more. Jack left and the video link shut off.

Walking down the hall in a very future Torchwood, their top time operative flashed a badge and walked through the doors to a lab. The blood sample he carried was only a few minutes old for him, but it had been years for the woman he took it from.

"What do you want, Jack?" Asked the scientist seated at the table.

"I'm cashing in on an old favor." He said, dangling a blood sample in front of his face.

"You're serious?" The man said.

"As the plague."

"Jack, you act as though you're trying to raise the dead-" Jack shook his head.

"Not raise the dead- more like liberate the not-quite-alive." The scientist had no clue what he was talking about, but he did owe Jack his life and his job, so he grudgingly obliged. He fitted the sample into a machine and it started to do its work. Torchwood had perfected its work with the Flesh this far in the future, and it was very stable now. After two or three minutes the man announced that River's double was stable, though asleep. It was safe to wake her up and take her out.

"Oh, and take this." He handed jack a long button up lab coat.

"What for?"

"It was from a blood sample- she won't be wearing anything." The scientist said. Jack went over to the room where the chambers were for the Flesh people. One of them had a green light shining, which meant its occupant was ready, willing, and able to be taken out. Well, maybe not ready and willing, but at least able. He opened the door and let her out, trying not to stare.

"Where am I?" River's double asked, slipping into the labcoat. "What's happened?" She began to grow a little frantic.

"Don't worry." Jack said. "This is something we've had planned for a while. Sit down." They sat at a table drinking tea and he told her about everything that had happened. About the computer core and the library- everything her future self had told him when she instructed him to take that sample. That was how he knew she would do it; she told him after she'd gotten out.

"So, if I go with you I get all the memories I should have like I never died in the Library?" She asked. Jack nodded.

"Yes. You'll be… you. Just as you were before you died, with a few extra memories from what we're doing now, of course."

"But… I'll be Flesh." She said. "The Doctor could disintegrate me with a zap of the sonic!" Jack hadn't thought of that, but then he remembered her catch 22: she could regenerate.

"What if you regenerated?" He asked. "The archive for regeneration in your brain changes every atom in your body- it's set to Time Lady, not Flesh."

"I haven't got any left, Jack." She said, sighing. For a fraction of a second she regretted not having them, and then mentally slapped herself for thinking so.

"Then I guess it's leave as Flesh or-"

"Stay here forever." River weighted her options for a moment. It seemed as though this was her only way out, but it involved changing herself again. It wasn't something she wanted to go through with, but from the way Jack described things in the data core… "Alright. I'll do it." She said. Jack smiled and held out his vortex manipulator, and a second later they were standing in the Library's computer core, bathed in a bright white light. "What now?" She asked. They stood in silence, waiting.

Inside the data core, River hugged Charlotte goodbye.

"Thank you so much. For everything. I'll miss you." Said River. "Be good, live well." Charlotte smiled her goodbye and pressed the teleport button.

River was atoms.

Just for a very brief second she was atoms floating in the air, threatening to die off, but wait! There it is, the bright, conscious, willing mind, just waiting and ready to accept her.

"River? Are you alright?" Jack asked, a hand on her shoulder as she shuddered and gasped. She looked around with new eyes.

"Yes… I'll be fine in a second." She said, looking around at the library's core. Looking at the chair where she died, and the handcuffs still linked to the post. The memories of her Flesh self flooded into her head, and she was suddenly aware that she was just a tiny bit more than the River she was before she came here. Still not quite… not quite something. Not quite… _whole_. Her body wasn't the one from the library, it was younger, the one he'd taken the blood from.

"We need to leave. Now." Jack said, looking around at the darkness that was increasing, and he grabbed her arm, teleporting them both out. River still looked dazed, but she was coming around, becoming more and more aware of the physical world every second.

"Thank you, Jack!" She said, hugging him, then she slapped him.

"Ow! What was that for?" He asked, indignant.

"For staring, you dirty old time agent!" She said. Suddenly River gasped, feeling a familiar pain in her chest. "Jack… ah!" River fell to her knees, clutching her chest, her hands beginning to glow.

"River? What's going on?" Jack asked, concerned. They both knew- she was regenerating.

"I don't-" She let out another cry of pain. "Know! Get back!" Something was wrong. She shouldn't be regenerating- she had none left. Though she didn't have time to think about it, because suddenly she was in flames, Jack stepping back from the immense heat filling the room and setting off the sprinklers. In a moment or two she collapsed onto the floor in a heap, and Jack ran to her. Her chest heaved up and down, breathing forcefully in and out, like someone who had just run a marathon.

She was the same. Well, not quite the same- she was the River he'd seen in the Library's computer core. Her hair was darker, more tame, and when she opened her eyes, they looked older. River gazed at her body- the new body was the old body. The new body that she shouldn't even have in the first place.

"How does that work?" She asked. Jack shrugged.

"You're the Time Lady, you tell me." River thought for a moment before responding.

"I think that… I think that when the minds merged something happened. The cells must have registered two minds as meaning one current and one potential, so another regeneration pending."

"And it just… happened? You were fine before." Jack said, helping her stand.

"It could just be the mind coping with merging. It could be from a Time Lord brain in a Flesh body. I really don't know… but I think when I regenerated everything reverted to the me from the Library."

"Why would you say that?" He asked.

"Because I can't remember any of what happened to her between when you first saw her and when my mind came in. Just my memories, all the way. It may have even given me an extra regeneration, judging by the whole 'same body' thing." She said. Jack made an unconscious note that it was probably a good thing, and he had a different theory.

"It could have just been the mind coping with the stress of regeneration- throw out everything that isn't hardwired in." River nodded.

"Maybe so. But right now, I vote we get me some proper clothes and find the Doctor." She said. Jack nodded his agreement and they walked down the hall to the wardrobe.

After she was properly dressed, she asked if Jack would take her to a very specific place, one that she knew for a fact was probably the last time the Doctor would ever see her in his timeline… or so he thought.

It was after he brought her home from the Singing Towers. That was the out-of-order point for both of them, the moment she shouldn't have had before her death, but he came to give to her. Love makes you do some things you wouldn't normally do, including risking paradoxes.

When he left her house she was waiting outside for him. Jack had dropped her off and she was just standing there beside the TARDIS, waiting. When he saw her he was shocked. Happy, but shocked.

"River?" He cleared his throat and rubbed his eyes. "Sorry… where- where are we?" He asked. She tried to contain it- all the love she had that was welling up inside her- but it spilled over and ran down her cheeks, even though she forced herself to stay still.

"I've- I've just come from the Library." She choked out.

"You're lying." He said. "I know you are. You…" But she knew he couldn't say it.

"I died. I know, yes. But you saved me- quite literally, actually." He walked up to her, but he didn't touch her, not yet.

"How? How can it be you?" He asked, not believing her but wanting to more than anything in the world. So she told him. She stood there crying and blubbering like an idiot, spilling out the entire story- about the flesh, about regeneration, about everything. And he looked at her like she was completely insane. The Doctor pulled out the sonic and scanned her up and down, then looked at it in his peculiar way, like he was checking some invisible reading.

"You're full Time Lady now. The same as before- it recognizes your DNA. And your age matches up to your story." He still didn't want to believe it. He was too positive this was a trick and she'd be ripped out of his hands and hearts yet again. "Tell me something. Prove to me you're really her, that you're not lying to me. Tell me something only my River Song would know." He said, his green eyes piercing into her very heart. She leaned forward and softly whispered a single word into his ear, then stepped back to look in his eyes. His face was a mask for a moment, but then he suddenly pulled her close and kissed her. Their tears mingled as their faces touched, and she shook from her crying, but somehow they made it inside the TARDIS.

"Doctor?" She began. He stroked her face gently, wondering if it was a dream. "Does… does this mean I can stay?" He looked at her a moment, and then they both had the same thought. The Doctor laughed and spun her around.

"Can you stay? What sort of a stupid question is that?" He said. "Of course you can stay!" She held him close, her Doctor that she hadn't seen in so long.

"You don't know how long I've wanted to hear you say that." She whispered.

"But there's a condition." He said seriously. She raised an eyebrow. "From now on, we're linear. No more 'I do this, you do that' nonsense, we're staying straight." River nodded. That sounded like something from a fairy tale book, but she was sure that it couldn't be any worse than the last time she saw him.

"We've already done everything non-linear, so I don't see why there would be a problem with us having a straight timeline from now on." River said. Suddenly the TARDIS gave a lurch and went into flight of her own accord. They simply held on this time, not really caring where they were taken. The Doctor smiled and River rushed to open the doors, but found them locked. She had just enough time to wonder what the TARDIS was doing before the Doctor came over.

"River, do you realize what this means?" He asked. She smiled, waiting for him to continue. "We're _linear_!" The Doctor said, incredibly excited and overjoyed that he would finally have a life with his wife- a real life, a life that was _in order_. He pinned her against the door and kissed her, not that the door was really necessary. His hands tangled in her hair and she covered his face and neck with kisses, as you can imagine the joy of two lovers reunited after far too long.

However, they were interrupted by a clicking sound and the door opening behind River, causing them both to topple onto the ground outside, the Doctor lying on top of her. They found themselves looking up at Amy and Rory as River remembered them from before she left- older, but they still didn't look old. Must be the effects of time traveling, she decided a long time ago. Amy had unlocked the door with her key.

"Are we interrupting something?" She said, laughing. The Doctor stood and helped River up.

"I think we've got some explaining to do." He said.

_To be continued…_


	2. What to Do When the Rain Comes Back

River, Rory, Amy, and the Doctor all sat around the living room in Amy and Rory's house, drinking tea and not wanting to say anything. Saying something would acknowledge that there was something they needed to talk about, and none of them wanted to say what inevitably was going to be said.

"We thought you were dead." Rory finally broke the silence. "The people at the Library said you'd died." River nodded.

"I did, in a way. But the Doctor saved me, very literally. My consciousness was kept in a neural relay on the sonic he gave me, and he saved it to the Library's computer core. The only reason I couldn't teleport right back out was because I didn't have a body." Rory had his traditional confused look and Amy shook her not-quite-as-red locks, as if attempting to clear her head.

"Hold on, how do you get a body?"

"The Flesh." The Doctor said. The confusion was replaced with shock. "Jack took a DNA sample of her younger self a long time ago, and then gave instructions to his younger self on when to do so and why. In a way it had already happened before we even had a clue about it."

"So… you're Flesh? My daughter is Flesh?" Rory asked, eyeing her strangely.

"No." Said River, shaking her head. "I regenerated. Regeneration resets everything in your body- changes every atom. It was set to change it to Time Lady, not Flesh. I am _me_, completely and fully."

"I thought you used all you regenerations." Amy said.

"So did I." Rory confirmed. "Back in Berlin." The Doctor took a moment to explain about what they thought happened when River's two bodies and minds had merged.

"So what happened to the… other you?" Amy asked, implying the River made of Flesh.

"She's still in here." River tapped her head. "Keep in mind, we have exactly the same memories from up until he took the blood sample, which was about six years ago for me. It was her- my- choice to come and let the rest of me back into her brain; no one forced me." They sat for a moment more sipping their tea, trying to let everything that had happened sink in.

"What will you do now?" Rory asked. "The whole world thinks you're dead. You can't just… come back, can you?" River shook her head.

"No. I can't." She took a deep breath, knowing he probably wouldn't be happy with her choice. "That's why I'm going with the Doctor." Amy smiled softly, but Rory nearly dropped his mug.

"What?" He asked. "You can't do that, you'll… you just can't!" He said. River glanced over at the Doctor, who motioned for her to go on, and then looked back at Rory with a sigh.

"I can't just come back, you said it yourself. I'm still a Time Lady- I'll live for hundreds of years. You know very well it's the only way."

"So you're going off into time and space and leaving us behind?" He asked, attempting not to tear up. She sat down her mug and hugged him.

"No. Never. He's my husband- children grow up and move out, raise a family. It's not so different, and you know if you need me I'll only be a call away." Rory pulled away and looked at her a second.

"I guess those days come, hm? The ones when you have to let go." She nodded.

"That they do. I never thought I was going to get past mine, but here I am." They said their goodbyes, and the Doctor fought hard not to cry, then Amy and Rory went back to whatever they'd been doing and River and the Doctor walked hand in hand back to the TARDIS. The Doctor stopped and turned to look back at River, who was leaning against the railing on the steps.

"What's wrong?"

"Doctor, I should be dead." He walked over to her, concerned for what might come next. "I keep… I keep wondering if maybe I am dead." River could feel her throat closing up, could hear herself choking on her own words. "I mean, how would I know? Maybe the person who died in the Library has already gone to a better place, if you know what I mean. Maybe I'm just… just a data imprint. Just numbers and lines, just… binary code. How will I ever really know?" She asked. He supposed she carried her own curse now- whether she was really back, or whether she was still living a sort of not-life, as a data stream and not a human. However, he knew what the truth was, and he thought that somewhere deep down, so did she… the problem was how to express it. He took her hands in his, stepping a little closer.

"River, computers are smart. They can imitate life, they can imitate thoughts, words, actions, emotions…" She started to cry, tears rolling down her face. His words cut her very soul like a knife, slicing through her being and making her wish she would have died on that fateful day so long ago. She even wished, for a tiny second, that she never met him, but she regretted it as soon as she had done so.

"But…" the Doctor continued softly. "A computer can't feel. Not really. It can give a good impression of feeling, but some things…" He took a hand and placed it under her jaw, cupping her face and wiping her tears with his thumb. River stood there in tears, taking comfort in the Doctor's soft touch, wondering where he was going with this, when the Doctor reached out and felt her _mind_. And he saw very, very clearly exactly what she was.

He saw the look on his face when they met at the Library, felt the anguish that she felt even at this moment at the time when he didn't know her- his love, his wife. He felt the fear she'd felt when he saw her after the Library, and the joy that threatened to consume her entire being when he's kissed her for the first time in so long. He smelled his scent on her clothes and tasted his breath in her mouth, and realized how much she loved that scent- time had a peculiar smell, he supposed. He saw her saying goodbye to Amy and Rory and felt the salty tears sting his eyes and the ache in his chest that he knew belonged to her. He experienced how she felt every time he touched her- like fire, and starlight, and electricity that tingled down her spine at the slightest brush.

These were feelings deeper than emotion. Some things can't be mimicked by a computer, can't be hard wired in, no matter how sophisticated it seems. There are feelings rooted deeper in the heart and mind than any of us imagine, and we never cease to amaze ourselves when these feelings surface- anguish, joy, hatred… love. Those things can't be imitated by a computer because they took something more than a mind: a heart and a soul. She gasped softly as his mind let go of hers, though his hand still remained on her cheek. He knew he had seen the same things that he had.

"You, my River Song, are absolutely anything but a computer program." He smiled and River hugged him tightly. When she pulled away the Doctor brought his face to hers and kissed her, but she pulled away ever so slightly, their foreheads still touching.

"I love you." She whispered.

"I love you, too. Till the end of time." He replied, and pressed his mouth to hers once more.


	3. Flooding and How to Save Yourself

_A note for those of you who haven't read The Rain and the River, as this will really confuse you otherwise: Raina is the Doctor and River's daughter, who I am bringing back for this chapter only because I think it's only natural for a mother to want to see her child after she's been trapped in a computer core for who knows how long. Raina has a convergence insufficiency (sees double sometimes) and it allows her to see through time by the state of the double- ie, old, rusted, shaped differently._

_This chapter is pretty long, just so you know._

"So, now that you're back," said the Doctor, "where do you want to go?" River didn't hesitate a second.

"You know where I want to go." She said. The Doctor smiled, as he knew exactly where she wanted to go.

There were so many places out in the universe, the moons of Rygar, collapsing galaxies, watching the Aroura Borealis from space… but the place she wanted to go was none of those. He remembered that one time- the one time he'd risked it, risked coming back to see her in the Library. He'd kept the screwdriver and her diary, creating a new one simply so he could keep the one that River used. She'd told him goodbye, but she'd also told him to get a message to a very particular person.

"Well?" She asked. He gestured to the doors.

"Take a look." River walked down the steps and opened the doors, stepping out hesitantly. "Go on, the world doesn't bite!" The Doctor teased, rushing out after her. They stood outside a public high school, nearly deserted as it was still an hour before school actually ended. They walked inside gingerly and were stopped by a woman at the front office.

"Excuse me? All visitors need to check in." She said.

"Oh, we're not visiting, we're picking up a student. Raina Song." The Doctor said. Raina had adopted her mother's last name a while ago, being as the Doctor didn't have one. The woman nodded and smiled.

"Yes. I'll just need to see some ID to make sure you're clear." She said. The Doctor flashed his psychic paper in her face. She scrutinized it, then picked up the phone.

"Mr. Green? Raina needs to come to the office, her parents are checking her out." She paused. "Thanks." She hung up the phone and instructed them to a waiting area outside.

In a classroom not too far away, Raina practically jumped for joy, toppling her chair as she stood. Her things were already packed- she'd gathered them up as discreetly as possible when she felt the TARDIS key grow warm around her neck. The teachers were sort of accustomed to her parent's odd visits. They'd been coming about once a month for the past four months, and though they never knew when, it seemed like Raina always did. She sat the chair back up and ran out the door, not caring about homework because, after all, it was the last day of school.

Raina walked around the corner to see two people who looked utterly out of place. A tall man wearing a tweed jacket and a bow tie, and a woman with curly hair a bit more tame than her own, though dressed normally in a sweater that was slightly too long, black pants, and boots. They both looked young- about 30- but she knew that he was over a thousand and she was probably approaching fifty. The woman saw her first and she ran up and hugged her.

"River!" Raina said, smiling into her shoulder.

"It's so good to see you." River said, some deep rooted maternal instinct kicking in now that her child was back in her arms. "How've you been? No- no- wait! Let me guess-" She let go.

"Fine. Bored." They said at the same time, laughing. That was her usual answer.

"What am I, invisible?" Asked the Doctor. Raina smiled and ran over. He picked her up and hugged her like he usually did.

"Hello, Doctor." They walked out the doors towards the TARDIS. "So, what have you guys been up to?" She asked. She always liked hearing about their adventures, or at least what they could tell her.

"Well… we're actually…" The Doctor began, and River caught his eye. Some silent agreement passed between them not to tell her anything about what had happened in the Library. "We're actually a bit linear now." He said.

"No way." Raina said, voice thick with disbelief. "You're serious? How does that work?" She asked.

"It's a long, complicated story, but as soon as we found out we wanted to come here and tell you." Said River, which was only half a lie. They had wanted to tell her, but mostly they wanted to come so they could all talk without fear of timeline breaches, and because neither of them had seen Raina in a while.

"So… my Time Lord parents came in their time and space ship to pick me, their almost-fully-Time-Lord child, up from school to tell me their timelines are in the right order now and we can all talk to each other without being worried about causing a paradox that will rip apart the fabric of the universe- is that what I'm getting?" River and the Doctor burst out with surprised laughter.

"Yep, that's pretty much it!" The Doctor said. "So, to celebrate… where do you want to go?"

"Anywhere-"

"But a museum." River finished with her. That had also become the standard answer after the time Daleks had shown up at the Smithsonian during her school trip. Raina walked around the console, fingering it lightly, and suddenly pointed to a switch that hadn't been used for a long while.

"What's that?" She asked. The Doctor smiled.

"Why don't you push it and find out?" She smiled and flipped the switch, one thing that he normally would never let her do.

The whole console shook and lurched, and River reached to take the handbrake off so the TARDIS wouldn't make that noise when it landed. Eventually the shaking stopped, and they landed in… well, at least they were still in once piece.

"What did that do?" Raina asked, picking herself up from the floor.

"That was the randomizer. Haven't used it much since the days of the Black Guardian, but it's still good for surprises."

"So… that means we could be anywhere, right?" River nodded in excitement and Raina rushed towards the doors. When she opened them she was looking out over a railing at hundreds of people waving on a dock. Looking to the left, she saw crowds pressed up against the ship's railing watching the water roll by. Hold on- _ship's_ railing? The Doctor came out, followed shortly by River, and noticed that Raina wasn't staring at the crowds or the water, or even the boat itself as it sliced through the icy black ocean. She was staring at a life preserver hung on the wall next to them, which read very clearly:

**USS TITANIC**

"Oh, dear." River said. "This is a bad idea- this is a very bad idea." The Doctor nodded distractedly.

"Probably so…" Then he sauntered off across the deck, going who knows where.

"But we can't change anything. Why is he running off?" Raina said.

"No, we can't." River responded, but then realized it wasn't a question. "Wait a minute. How did you know that?" Raina shrugged gesturing around the ship.

"I can feel it. It's like there's this sense of… of utter doom just woven into the air. And it's not like a premonition, it's like it's too late to turn back and no one can unweave it without causing new threads to form. It would change all of history. Can't you feel it?" She asked, the vacant look on her face turning to stark curiosity focused on River Song.

"Yes. But I only thought it was me."

"Also, I can see through time, remember? None of these things have doubles- they _have_ no future for me to see." They walked down the deck of the ship towards where the Doctor had disappeared to. The crowds were beginning to disperse to explore the ship, and River and Raina stuck out like sore thumbs in their modern clothing.

"The one time he doesn't stick out like he should…" muttered River.

"Ah-ha!" The Doctor jumped out from behind them and they gasped in surprise. "We've got a cabin, can you imagine that? Under 'the Doctor.' I must have booked it in my future…"

"So we're staying?" Raina asked, a little nervous of the prospect of staying on a ship that she knew was doomed to sink.

"Well… for a bit. Who can resist a sinking ship, eh?" He sauntered off down the hallway, opening a door to a first class cabin. Inside, it was so… old. Very 1912, which was fitting. There were two rooms, one for Raina with a double bed, and one for River and the Doctor with a slightly bigger bed. Under the Doctor's orders, both River and Raina changed into less conspicuous clothing, meaning period dresses.

They spent the rest of the day exploring the ship, and River made her way up to the front of the deck to lean against the railing on the side. She looked longingly over the waters as the wind hit her face, wishing she weren't in this hot, constricting dress whose neckline was nearly cutting off her air supply. Someone came up behind her and put their arms around her waist. She recognized the smell immediately and leaned her head back onto the Doctor's shoulder.

"Almost like flying, hm?" He asked softly, whispering into her curls. She laughed.

"Flying? Flying isn't nearly as smooth as this, especially if you're the one driving." They heard a click from the side that snapped them out of their moment- someone had set up a camera and was taking pictures of the passengers. The cameraman waved.

"Best shot I've gotten all day!" He called. The Doctor and River glanced at each other, then burst out laughing.

"You know, I think a few of those pictures actually did survive. You know, there was this really old movie Rose made me watch once about the Titanic, and they sort of did something similar to what we… I wonder if…" He watched the cameraman walk away to set up elsewhere.

"You don't think?" He shrugged, and more of River's musical laughter followed.

"Maybe so." The Doctor pressed a soft kiss to River's jaw. "How are you enjoying the Titanic?" He asked. She stiffened, and the Doctor could feel the sense of danger returning to her.

"I can't shake it. That awful sense of doom in the air- Raina felt it, too. Is it a Time Lord thing or is it just us?" She turned away from the water, facing him.

"Yeah, it's a Time Lord thing. The Titanic is a fixed event, it's just one of those things that has to happen. That's the knowledge we're born with, that we have to bear."

"That she'll have to bear alone one day." River said, referring to Raina.

"No. I won't let that happen." He said firmly. "I'll find a way." Suddenly Raina came rushing across the deck, nearly falling over from the either the boat or the dress she wasn't quite used to yet.

"We have-" She huffed a few breaths. "-a problem." River and the Doctor immediately became all business. There was time for personal matters later.

"What's wrong? Well, besides the fact that we're on a ship that will inevitably sink?" The Doctor said, still willing to crack a weak joke. River rolled her eyes.

"That's the problem. It's not going to sink." She said, eyes wide and fearful.

"What do you mean it's not going to sink? It's the _Titanic_!" The Doctor practically yelled, and both the ladies beside him shushed him quickly.

"Let me show you. Turn towards the water and act like you're looking at something." Raina said, taking both their hands. In her mind she pictured what she'd seen, and the Doctor and River could see it, too: the Titanic, rusted and old, and the captain and crew growing old. All their doubles, like ghosts from the future… a future they shouldn't have.

"What was that?" River asked.

"That's what I see with my convergence. It scares me." She said, seeming almost six for all her seventeen years.

"I know." The Doctor said, hugging her with some sort of long buried paternal instinct. "I never thought I'd have to say this… but we have to sink this ship." He started off towards their cabin, where they could talk in private.

"How in the world do you suggest we sink the Titanic?" River asked. The Doctor paced the room, trying to hide the awful feeling he had- all those people could live if he did nothing! Nothing! But he had to kill them, because it had already happened and he couldn't change it.

"Doctor? What's wrong?" Raina asked, wondering why River hadn't noticed. However, River had noticed- she'd noticed the moment Raina had showed them what she'd seen. He was the Doctor- the man who makes people better, and he still didn't think he was a good man. He failed to realize that he _was_ ultimately a good person, regardless of what happened.

"This is like Pompeii." Neither of them had heard this story. He didn't talk about things like this until they were forced out of him. "I made the volcano explode. It was a choice between Pompeii or the rest of human history, and…" he sighed, collapsing into a chair with his face in his hands. "I couldn't have done it if Donna wasn't there." River put a hand on his shoulder very cautiously. She knew how touchy some subjects were.

"Best friends always help. We're here, too, Doctor." He looked up, a fierce determination to carry on the only thing left to help him stand.

"Alright. First of all we need to figure out why she isn't going to sink. Start with the obvious, work our way up to the complex."

"She doesn't hit the iceberg." Raina suggested, smiling a little. That did get a laugh out of the Doctor.

"Ok, maybe not quite that obvious."

"The iceberg isn't there?" Raina said.

"But why wouldn't the iceberg be there- it's a _giant_ piece of _ice_!" River thought for a second.

"Well, maybe it is there. Maybe we're just not heading towards it anymore." Raina looked up with wide eyes.

"Of course! The ship's changed course!" She slapped her forehead. "Why didn't I think of that before?"

"It happens." River said. "Is there any way we can get a look at those charts?" She asked. The Doctor flashed his psychic paper.

"Where there's a will, there's a way." He smiled. "But there will have to be a way later, as I don't want to look around until after dark.

"I hate to ask this because I know there's probably some rule against it," Raina began, "but why can't we just go back in time and check?" She asked. The Doctor sighed.

"We're part of events now- things like that are out." She glanced at River with questioning eyes.

"If we go there because of what we see now to prevent what we see now from happening, it'll create a paradox because what happened to make us go there won't have happened in the first place." Raina nodded.

"Why is it she always gets in when you explain it?" The Doctor asked, a little grumpy. River smiled.

"Because I'm her mum. And I talk slower than you." She smiled smugly and glanced out the window. "Go. The sun's set. We need to go now, while the shifts are changing." River said.

"No, we don't need to go, I need to go. You two stay here." Raina opened her mouth to say something, but the Doctor shushed her. "No arguments. One person won't be as easy to spot as three."

"Fine. But be quick." River said.

The Doctor slipped out the door and ran down the hall as soundlessly as he could. The shifts were changing that were guarding the brig. He managed to hide behind some boxes and slip into the ship's control room to sneak a peek at the charts. It only took him a second to find out what he needed to know, and he crept back to the room as quickly as he could, though it took a bit longer to dodge the crew this time.

"The ship isn't off course, I checked." The Doctor said, bursting into the room. River bit her lip, thinking.

"Ok, so back to assumption one: the iceberg physically isn't there."

"But icebergs don't just come out of the blue! We can't just go out there and _make_ an iceberg!" Raina said, exasperated. Then she looked up quickly. "We _can't_ make an iceberg, can we?" The Doctor shook his head, but River's eyes lit up with an idea.

"Yes we can. Doctor, do you still have that future sonic?" He held up the new sonic and Raina scrutinized it for a moment, taking it in. "Raina, you have yours, right?" She nodded. "There's a pitch that can break glass if you hit it just so- do you think it would be enough to split an icecap?"

"Well," said the Doctor, thinking out loud, "maybe. If Raina amplifies my sonic with hers, maybe." River picked up her skirts and headed towards the door.

"Well, then, let's go!" With no time to protest, the Doctor and Raina followed her out the door and up to the top deck of the ship.

"What are we doing up here?" Raina asked, arms wrapped around herself from the wind. The Doctor scanned the horizon and started to explain.

"Well, the best place to send a sonic wave from is high up, so this would be the most ideal situation to send it from. Actually, the most ideal-"

"Doctor!" River interrupted sharply.

"Fine. Raina- setting 364 is a sonic amplifier. I need you to use it on my sonic so I can send out the signal. The pitch is actually above the range of human hearing, but… if there are any bats on board I suppose we'll find out now." He raised his sonic and Raina did the same, though the only noise was coming from Raina's sonic, much lower pitched than the Doctor's was. They heard a crack- sharp and loud, almost like lightning, but not quite that fantastic. Raina's double vision swam before her eyes and she fought the urge to close them tightly. A minute later it was over and River was supporting a dizzy Raina as they ran down the steps.

"Are you alright?" She asked as Raina leaned against the rail, too dizzy to walk.

"It's going to sink now." She said. Everything is one image again. I saw it change," she said, a little distressed, "I saw time change- it came back together! It… stopped." The Doctor paced back and forth and the trio stood in silence for a moment.

"So the ship _is_ going to sink now, right?" River asked, trying to clarify everything.

"Yes. Well, it should. In fact, it's due to sink right about…" The Doctor checked his watch and they heard a dreadful noise from below decks. "Well, you get the picture- let's go!" He grabbed Raina's hand and they scooted back to where the TARDIS was parked. Well, where it had been parked before.

"Oh, no. This really is Pompeii." He ran over to one of the crew. "Excuse me- there was a big box right there. Where is it?" The man looked scared. "Tell me where!"

"In- in the hold. Below decks." River slapped her forehead, ready to scream in frustration.

"Well, come on, then, it's not like we have a lot of time!" They ran down steps to the hold, finding that it was already starting to fill with icy ocean water. The TARDIS wasn't hard to spot, thankfully, but the water was pouring in fast, and it's hard to move when you're numb. By the time they reached the doors the water was up to their knees, and they could hear panicked cries and footsteps from above. The Doctor turned the key in the lock and the three of them, along with quite a bit of water, came tumbling into the console room. The Doctor, with a little help from River, slammed the door shut.

They lay on the floor, sopping wet and gasping for air, until the Doctor suggested that he get a mop. Raina sat up, tucking her knees to her chest, and River came over to sit beside her. Raina had tears in her eyes.

"What's wrong, sweetie?" She asked.

"All those people… they died. I could feel it- I could feel time changing and I felt their deaths come into the timeline, and… and then I heard the screams. And we waltz in there like visitors to a party, like they're pawns in our great chess scheme, and we get to live." River hugged her and she buried her head in her shoulder.

"You know something? It's ok to cry about it. Being a Time Lord can sometimes make you… a bit callous and indifferent to everyone around you, and that's something you can't let happen to you." She paused for a moment, thinking of what to say. "The Titanic was fixed, and we couldn't change it without changing the rest of history around it. All those people helped make their mark on the world, and they will never, never be forgotten." River recalled something from a very long time ago as she said these words. A beach, and an astronaut, and the Doctor… and who she knew was in the suit. And why she knew those bullets would never reach their mark. She stood up slowly and brought Raina to her feet.

"Why don't you go get some sleep? It might make you feel better. You know where your room is." Raina gave a brave smile and dragged her sopping skirts down the hall. The Doctor came back with a mop at that point.

"Where's Raina?"

"She went to bed."

"Ah." The Doctor knew just as well as anyone what a little rest would do for you. He started mopping up the sopping wet mess left from the salt water. River's skirts were still dripping, but she didn't move to change them. There was something she needed to tell them- a weight on her very soul that she had to get rid of if she ever planned to be happy with him. She's told him before, she was sure, but it had to be said one more time.

"Doctor, there's something I need to tell you." She said.

"What? I know, remember? We're linear now." She nodded.

"I know. But I still never told you."

"What was that?" He asked, coming towards her slowly. There were tears in her eyes, though he couldn't understand why.

"It was you." The Doctor was incredibly confused.

"What was?" River's next words came out in a shaky whisper.

"The best man I ever knew. The man I killed. It was me in the astronaut suit that day." The reason her bullets never hit, she knew, was because if she ever did manage to kill her younger self it would cause a paradox. "I am so, _so_ sorry, Doctor. I can never tell you that enough." She collapsed onto the stairs, head in her hands, finally shedding the weight and the truth that she'd carried for so long simply because she didn't have the strength _not_ to carry it. She wanted to cry, to scream, to hold him close and feel that he was alive and well in her arms, but instinct and years of training prevented her from doing so. She felt everything she could possibly feel, and at the same time felt nothing, because she truly couldn't afford to feel it at all. The Doctor nodded sadly, walking towards her. He knew she wanted to cry, but that was the thing- River Song doesn't cry.

"I know it was you, and I know it was me… but it wasn't me." The Doctor sat beside her and gently put an arm around her, her body shaking with invisible tears and racking sobs with no external voice. He could feel them, though, on the very edges of her mind.

"What do you mean it wasn't you? I saw. You die." She said. "How did you survive?"

"Survive? I never died." River was confused now, and she peered curiously up at the Doctor. "It was my ganger. Paradoxes and doubles… they're confusing things." She pulled out of the hug and slapped him. "_What was that_- oh. _Oh_! _That's_ what that slap was for!" He remembered her slapping him in that diner so long ago, rubbing his face from either the memory or the more recent sting. It was one of those things he'd never bothered to make a connection to.

"That was for making me think you were dead! And yes, that _was_ what it was for." The Doctor smiled.

"Same old River." River sighed and walked off into her room.

The stars twinkled on the ceiling as she shed her sopping clothes and traded them for a soft nightgown. Unpinning her hair, she wiped the last traces of tears finally shed from her face with the back of her hand, making a note not to be so weepy. She really wasn't a sentimental person- she couldn't afford to be, but being linear was such an adjustment for the both of them that it was hard not to be over some matters, and not just for her. River supposed the simple knowledge that they _could_ be emotional now drove them to that point sometimes.

These first few days were going to be hard for both of them. There were so many things they had to get through, so many moments to sort out. The Doctor used to think living a linear life would be easier, but now he wasn't so sure. So many things she'd never told him, and so many more he still hadn't told her. Now they had every moment of forever in their hands and they still couldn't say everything they needed to. Why? Because it was too painful, and some of it didn't need to be said. Some things can be seen and felt rather than expressed as words- you can see bravery in a smile that doesn't quite reach the teary eyes, you can see heartache in an expression so blank it gives everything away, and 'I love you' is said in the gentlest kiss pressed to someone's forehead, and the smile they give in return.

The Doctor stood next to the console for a few minutes, contemplating whether to follow her or not. She was his wife. No getting around that. And now he was sure she either really needed him or really didn't need him- after all these years he still couldn't quite tell the difference. Finally he removed his shoes and followed River down the hall to her room as quietly as he could, hoping for her not to notice.

Somewhere down the hall River slid under the single blanket she usually slept under (the night in Stormcage had her accustomed to too little warmth and no comfortable surfaces to sleep on) and lay down on the bed, her curls framing her face, flattering even in her sleep. The Doctor crept quietly into her room after she was close to sleep, slipped off his jacket and bow tie, and crawled in beside her, wrapping his arms around her waist. He'd taken to holding her while she slept, as if trying to fully come to terms with the fact that she was actually back, and after that experience he needed this time with her. She rolled over to face him and rested her head against his chest, smiling sleepily. Honestly, he wasn't quite sure she was fully awake. He stroked her shoulder gently, careful not to touch the cuts and bruises from their escape.

"Don't be so hard on yourself, Doctor." She whispered.

"I won't if you won't." She stiffened for a moment, not enough for anyone but him to notice, and he knew that she would never really stop being hard on herself.

"You're a good man. I am most definitely not a good woman." The Doctor made a mental note to give her yet another lecture on why he wasn't a good man when she was more awake.

"I'm really not. How many enemies have I made? How many people have died because of me? River, I know you know." Her eyes opened slowly.

"How many lives have you saved? How many worlds? How many universes?" He had no answer to that except to shift slightly and lay his head on the pillow beside her. "I said you were a good man, love," River said, pressing a kiss to his cheek, "I never said you were perfect."

"The same applies to you, you know." She gave a soft, breathy laugh, and closed her eyes again.

She supposed that was the thing about their relationship. They knew they were doomed from the start, and somehow have a better time coming to terms with that then the fact that their twisted, bloody, magical, dark fairytale romance might actually have an ending that was anything akin to happy. She wondered how long it might be before she would have to leave, and a second later realized she never would. Although something was eating at her chest, a worry that would always be there.


	4. Unreliable Water Sources

_In memory of Elizabeth Sladen._

In the morning they dropped off Raina at her home, said their goodbyes, and were almost immediately running towards a call from Torchwood that the scanner was picking up. The Doctor set up a video link to see the call.

"Doctor?" Jack asked. "Are you there or are we tapping into our own archives again?"

"Yeah, it's me. What's wrong?"

"I see. And Ms. Song- I see our plan worked out very well."

"What plan?" She asked, faking confusion.

"Oh, I-" Jack began, but River cracked a Cheshire Cat smile and he stopped. "You cheeky Time Lady…"

"Oh, shut up you two!" The Doctor said. "Now, what did you need?" Jack's focus turned back to the Doctor.

"We have a slight problem. Alien related- not quite sure what it is yet. We're calling in all the reserves."

"I'm a reserve! Since when did I get demoted to reserves?" The Doctor asked, his pride wounded. River laughed and Jack grinned.

"You didn't. You were there anyways. I was looking for Professor Song- this is subwave technology from our Dalek adventure. She got promoted." River's laughter grew louder as the Doctor's face fell. He looked like a little boy who woke up on Christmas to find nothing under the tree.

"You're joking." Jack shook his head, the grin widening. "So, who are the reserves, then?"

"You'll find out when you get here." The com shut off and River tried and failed to stifle her laughter.

"Promoted? The reserves are considered a _promotion_ now?" River slipped around him and gave the TARDIS console a pat.

"Ready old girl?" She pulled some switches and they were off, coming to a grinding stop quickly. "I hate that noise. But at least you don't use that awful hammer anymore." She walked down the steps towards the doors.

"How do you know about that?" The Doctor asked, long legs rushing to catch up to her.

"I've met your friends, remember? We may have swapped some stories." She smiled mischievously and opened the door. They were parked in the middle of a metal room with a domed ceiling, and somehow River got the feeling they were probably underground. She glanced around the room to find it completely barren besides some flashing equipment.

"So… what do we do now?" She asked quietly, almost afraid to speak. Like yelling in a library… but she tried not to think about libraries much anymore.

"Hello, Torchwood." The Doctor said, grinning.

"Voice match. Hello, 'the Doctor'." A female computer voice sliced through the air and River jumped at how loud it seemed in the still silence of the room.

"Aaa! Oh, my-"

"Voice match. Professor River Song." The Doctor burst out laughing.

"What?" River demanded.

"It only recognized you-" More laughter "-after you screamed!" She punched his arm playfully.

"I did not scream. I just…"

"Screamed."

"Shut up." She rolled her eyes and the doors on the far side of the room slid open to reveal Jack in his long, billowy coat, walking towards them.

"Doctor." He shook the Doctor's hand. "Professor Song." She nodded politely and he saluted, then they cracked a smile and he hugged her, picking her up slightly.

"Oof! Jack- some of us still need to breathe to live." She called, muffled against his shoulder and from the lack of air.

"Sorry." He sat her down and glanced at the Doctor, whose eyebrows were raised. "Alright. Are you guys ready to meet the rest of the reserves?" River nodded and the doctor shrugged. Jack turned and walked back through the metal doors and down a long hallway, finally turning into another room on the right. Inside there were some couches, chair, and tables, all organized to face one blank wall. Like a break room, but it obviously was a bit more than that. There were also several familiar faces.

"Torchwood reserves, meet the Doctor and River Song." I glanced around the room at the 5 people sitting and standing around. Martha Jones was curled up on the couch next to Mickey Smith, talking to a boy who was standing that she'd never seen before. In the corner, sitting in chairs were younger versions of Amy and Rory, who looked confused, but relieved to see us. Amy ran up and nearly knocked me over hugging me.

"Good to see you, Melody." It was a signal they'd worked out- if she called her Melody when they first walked up to each other, she knew who she was already.

"Nice to see you, too, mum." Mickey choked on his coffee, spitting it back out into the mug.

"_She's_ your mum?" He asked, surprised. Rory shrugged and Amy nodded happily. "You're ten years older than her!" River laughed musically, a laugh that sent shivers down the spines of both the Doctor and Jack.

"Twenty at least." River said. "Time travel. She knew me before I was born." Mickey sighed and settled back into the couch. The Doctor walked over to the boy and hugged him.

"Hello, Doctor." He said.

"Hello, Luke! How's your mum? Where is she?" His breath caught in his throat, and he swallowed hard before continuing.

"She… she died. Last April." The Doctor's own breath caught in his throat.

"Oh, no. Sarah Jane, no." He shook his head, eyes stinging with unshed tears. "I'm so sorry." Luke swallowed, ever the brave soul.

"It's ok. You came back to see us not long before she passed. Or, you will at least." That gave the Doctor a slight comfort, and he beckoned River forward.

"Let me introduce you to my wife. This is River Song." She shook hands with Luke while Martha took her turn to spit out her coffee.

"She's your _wife_?" She said, coughing a little. "You finally got married?"

"Oh, have we not done the wedding yet?" River asked. Martha shook her head. "You will." Jack cleared his throat and the seven others in the room looked at him.

"Introductions are nice, but I really need to let your guys know why you're here. Especially our new recruits. Take a seat." We all picked various spots on pieces of furniture or on the rugs around the floor, waiting for Jack to continue. "Alright, it looks like Martha and Mickey are the only vets, so let's do the formal introductions." He gestured to Amy. "Amelia Pond. 28, traveled with the Doctor. Your file says 'very Scottish.'" Amy waved and laughed.

"Hello!" Jack gestured to Rory.

"Rory Pond, aka Rory Williams or the Lone Centurion. 30, traveled with the Doctor. Died- wait. Why does your file have five deaths listed here?" Rory groaned.

"Well, I died in a dream, then I died and was erased from the universe, and then I came back as a plastic Roman, then I waited on Amy to get out of this box called the Pandorica for two thousand years, then it sort of looked like I died but it was a tranquilizer, then I almost died from drowning, but Amy did CPR and brought me back to life."

"Oh, and then there was that thing in the TARDIS-" Amy began.

"Yeah, but that was just it messing with your head." Rory nodded and motioned for him to continue, but instead Jack walked over and shook his hand.

"Bravo! You're catching up to me." He gestured to Martha and Mickey.

"Martha and Mickey Smith, 30 and 32, traveled with the Doctor. Both Torchwood vets, though Mickey worked for parallel Torchwood. They freelance now." They waved hello. Jack went to Luke next.

"Luke Smith, adopted son of a very dear, brave friend of ours named Sarah Jane Smith." He took a moment to salute, as if calling out to her memory. "16, helped his mom with their own freelance alien busting." Luke waved.

"Hi, everyone."

"Meet your new extended family, kid." Jack said, and Luke smiled. He kept going through the files. "Professor River Song. Aged… well, the file says 48, but I'm not sure if I believe that. Time Lady, traveled with the Doctor in the wrong order, married to the Doctor, as we previously established. Recently promoted to the reserves."

"Time Lady?" Luke asked. "I thought he was the last one." River shrugged.

"It's a very long, complicated story." Martha spoke up again.

"Promoted? I thought the reserves was the last resort- lowest of the low." She said. "What on earth was she promoted from?" At that second the doors slid open to reveal a tall woman with straight black hair.

"The list of the dead." She stopped short in front of the group. "Hello, everyone, I'm Gwen Cooper." She grabbed the files from Jack's hands and took over on the last remaining reading.

"The Doctor, age 1126, Time Lord." She chucked the files back at Jack. "You all know the rest. Now, the first thing you need to know about the reserves is that this is the place to be. You're here because you're the best of the best, and we don't want you running all about the front lines and getting killed when it isn't necessary. That's what Jack's for." She smiled cheekily and Jack flashed her a glare, earning a few chuckles around the room. "For Mr. and Mrs. Pond, you need to know that Jack can't die. Well, not from anything but old age. Probably. We're still trying to figure that out. As of now he just can't die." Amy and Rory didn't even look phased.

"Good. I can see you two are going to adjust quickly." Amy shrugged.

"We travel around with a 900 year old alien in a police box that's bigger on the inside, met our own daughter before she was born, found out she was our daughter when she was kidnapped by space bad guys, found out she was married to the Doctor and had a kid by him, and Rory's died five times. We've seen worse." River chuckled and the Doctor smiled, glad he picked such good friends.

"Alright, then. Here's the problem- it comes from parallel Torchwood. I've got a com set up in… 3…2…1…" A large video screen slid down from the ceiling and flicked on to reveal… Rose?

"Hello, everyone!" She said. "Glad you could all come. Now, obviously, if I can get this message to you-" Suddenly the parallel Doctor jumped in front of the screen.

"Oh, hello all! Hello, me!" He waved playfully and Martha couldn't help but laugh. Amy and Rory looked confused.

"Long story." The present Doctor whispered in their direction.

"Doctor!" Rose called, annoyed.

"Oh, sorry." He sat in a chair beside her so we could talk to both of them.

"As I was saying, if I can get this message to you, we have a problem. There's been a time-space breach allowing me to send this through the void."

"Which is bad." The Doctor said.

"Thank you, captain obvious!" River couldn't help but mutter.

"Oi!" The Doctor on the screen said, half joking, and they realized it wasn't a recording but a live feed. Rose laughed. "I don't care if you _are_ my wife in the future, no mumbling insults!" River covered her smile with her hand and the Doctor beside her shrugged.

"You get used to it." He said. Rose cleared her throat and continued.

"Point is that we have to close the breach on both sides to be able to properly seal it up, and we can't do this without your help. All of you have experience or skills in some way or another that we need you to utilize to find this breach. The Doctor obviously has a time machine, and River's a Time Lady. Amy and Rory, we've heard about you through cross-void communication, and you're brilliant troopers- very, very brave and smart. Martha and Mickey have worked with Torchwood and time traveled, and Luke has worked with his mum doing alien busting." Her eyes focused on him for a moment. "I'm very sorry. She was a fantastic woman." She said. Luke nodded his thanks and she continued. "We need you to find the breach and close it. We're not sure how big it is, but we've narrowed it down to Cardiff or New York. When you find it, send a relay to Torchwood and Gwen will communicate to us. We have to close both sides at the same time for this to work." Nods shifted around the room.

"Questions? Comments? Concerns?" The Doctor on the screen said.

"I have one." Amy said. "What if it's in midair or way underground? And how will we know when we find it?"

"The Doctor can take care of midair. Underground… well, we'll just have to dig. I think Torchwood has some detectors to help isolate where the energy flow is coming from, but you'll have to search in teams on foot for it."

"Yeah, and when you find it," Rose's Doctor said, "Be careful. The only people here who can safely approach the breach are Amy, Rory, Martha, and Luke."

"Why is that?" Rory asked, clearly wondering why _he_ had to be the one to approach the dangerous breach in space and time- he'd already died enough times, for pity's sake!

"You haven't been through the void." Rose said. Questioning eyebrows were raised.

"The void is the space between universes, and when you go through it you get this… stuff all over you. It's like a magnet to the other stuff, and if you get too close with it all over you, you'll get sucked in." The Doctor beside River said.

"It sort of wears off after time, but Mickey still probably won't be safe, and I'm not sure about the Doctor."

"What about me?" River asked. Rose thought for a second.

"How long?"

"Fifteen years."

"You might be alright- it depends on how potent it is. I wouldn't test it though."

"So, we're the only ones who haven't been smeared with an invisible time-space magnet that will pull us into nothingness." Amy asked. The Doctor on the screen shrugged.

"Pretty much. Everyone understand?" There was a general nodding and mumbled 'yes' throughout the room. "Good. Good luck." A hand reached forward, presumably for the controls, and shut the screen off.

"Alright. That settles it, then." Gwen said. "The Doctor and Luke need to come with me so we can set up a communications relay between here and the TARDIS. It will let you be able to speak to them without having to use us as a mediator. River, you can probably fix whatever's wrong with our blasted tracking systems without breaking it more in the process, so you go with Jack and try to do that. The rest of you need to go and get familiar with the handheld devices you'll be using in the field."

They all walked to their respective rooms, Martha, Gwen, and Jack each leading the ones who didn't know their way around. River followed him down yet another corridor and into a room filled with scanners… all of which had gone completely berserk. They were showing different images of Earth from space, earth from the streets, some even zoomed in on pebbles on a drive or zoomed out to the entire solar system!

"Oh, no." River said. "Let me take a look." She lay on her back on the floor and slid under the main control panel. Wires were tangled everywhere- crisscrossing and relaying the signal to all the wrong places. "Do we have wire cutters around here?" She asked Jack. "And ask the Doctor if I can borrow his sonic." She started fiddling with some of the wires and soon Jack returned with the two items. After clipping a few wires, reattaching others, and general fiddling with the controls, the screens all snapped to black at once, then rebooted to show the proper tracking images of New York City and Cardiff. River stood and brushed her hands off, leaning against the wall.

"Well, that should do it." Jack nodded, and River noticed that he was standing a little too close for her comfort.

"Jack? What are you doing?" She asked. She knew he was sneaky, but he was never like this. Always kind, always a friend.

"Oh, come on. We're alone. The Doctor is nowhere in sight." He said.

"Get away from me." River was beginning to be a bit scared, and slid across the wall in an attempt to get out of his grasp, but he stopped her with an arm, neatly pinning her into a corner. What was he doing? The Jack she knew… he was never like this.

"How am I supposed to resist a very pretty Time Lady that I have all to myself?" He asked, something in his eyes that she didn't want to name. Then she noticed something, something very small and very metal on the nape of his neck, blinking blue. Sonic transmitter- something was controlling him. She reached up to grab it, but he misinterpreted her intention and pulled her into a kiss, slamming her mouth into his. She fought the urge to shove him back and groped at his neck for a second before pulling out the small metal stud. He collapsed onto the floor in a heap- the effect on the mind of removing the transmitter would be very profound.

River retched from the taste of him, wiping her mouth and making a mental note to brush her teeth whenever she next got the chance, or drink some very strong black tea. Then she tended to Jack. A little blood was leaking out of the spot where she'd removed the device from, but he seemed fine otherwise. He was starting to come around now, hazy, but he sat up, rubbing his neck.

"Where am I?" A sudden realization lit up his face, and he saw River sitting there. "Oh my…" He hugged her. "I am so sorry, River." She hesitantly returned the hug, but when she pulled back she slapped him. He hissed a little. "Yeah, I deserved that one."

"Can you remember anything?" He nodded.

"I remember everything. It was like being a puppet- there was someone else in my head… I think they must have shot me with that thing, because I don't remember anyone being around when I lost control." He shook his head for a minute. "I lost control of my own body. My own mind. It was like sitting in on someone else's thoughts." He shook his head, still dizzy. After a moment he looked back up at River. "You have to believe me, I would never-"

"I know." She said. "What do you think clued me in?"

"I owe you." He said. She smiled a little.

"News flash." They stood and she checked his neck to see that the bleeding had stopped. "Do you think whatever did this had something to do with the breach?" She asked.

"I don't know. They were basically using me like a puppet with a camera, and the tech was very advanced. I don't think they knew how to control it, though." River raised an eyebrow.

"What do you mean?" She asked.

"They couldn't quite suppress me enough- every once in a while something would come out of my mouth that wasn't theirs, it was mine." She thought for a second.

"Ok, so we know someone wants to get inside Torchwood. First step- check all the staff and the reserves for these metal things. If you find any, remove them and bring them here. I'm going to see if I can narrow the search any closer to the source."

"Will do. But what are we going to do about the…?" He held up the silver dart.

"Good question for another day. Maybe tomorrow." She smiled.

Jack walked down the hall to where Martha was standing, trying to familiarize herself and everyone else with the tracking devices for the breach.

"This thing tracks the stuff leaking from the void by absorbing it and calculating how much of it is leaking through. So, whenever we get close, the saturation goes up."

"Ok, well, how exactly do we close it?" Rory asked.

"Rose's instructions said to push the self-destruct button and throw it in, but both sides have to do it within 5 minutes of each other. Otherwise the opposite half will reopen the hole." Jack coughed and Martha looked up.

"Sorry to interrupt, but I need to check you guys for something." He went around the room, brushing back hair and scrutinizing their heads, until everyone was confused and annoyed.

"What _are_ you doing?" Asked Rory, who was currently having his hair ruffed up by Jack.

"Checking for these." He said, holding up the silver dart. "It's some kind of mind control device. River found it on me, and I'm under orders to check everyone for them, just in case."

"Well, what's that all about, then? Time space breach and now mind control?" Amy asked. Jack shrugged.

"I don't know. It's a good question, but we don't have time to answer it now. Every second we waste is a second for that breach to get bigger. You're all clear- I need to go check the others." He walked out the door and down the hall to where Gwen, the Doctor, and Luke were working to set up communications with the TARDIS. The doors to the box were wide open and Jack stepped inside.

"Rose? Hello, can you hear us?" The Doctor asked, speaking to the scanner.

"Loud and clear! Give us a call when you find it."

"Will do!" They were clear of the darts, too, and the Doctor took Jack's dart to examine the technology.

Back in the tracking room, River pecked on keys in a seemingly random fashion, trying to track down what the source could possibly be. She tried to zero in on the energy leak, but it just kept slipping away. Finally she managed to lock onto the source in Cardiff.

"Oh, Jack…" She laughed, leaning on the desk.

"What's so funny?" A voice asked. It was Jack and the Doctor, come to check on her.

"You know that possibility that the breach could be in Cardiff?" She asked. They nodded. "It's not one."

"What do you mean?" Asked Jack, thoroughly upset. He rushed over to look at the computer screen, River still laughing.

"You were tracking Rift energy, Jack!" His face turned red and the Doctor joined the laugh.

"Well, in my defense, it looked suspicious…"

"Energy that's constantly spilling out of a well-known, _harmless_ little _dent_ in time and space looked suspicious to you?" The Doctor asked. Jack gave up at that and changed the subject instead.

"We know where it is now, at least. New York. From there we'll have to go on foot."

"You expect a team of 9 people to cover the entire city of New York on foot within a matter of days?" River asked. Jack shook his head.

"Absolutely not. I expect a team of 9 people to cover the entire city of New York on foot in a matter of hours." River sighed, then smiled.

"Sounds like you." There was a moment of silence, and then the Doctor jumped in.

"Why don't you go find the others and give them the update? Gwen wants to leave within the hour, and frankly, she's the only one with enough sense to fly a chopper around this place." Jack started to protest, but the Doctor's raised eyebrow stopped him. River wasn't too comfortable with leaving- it almost seemed like they were trying to get rid of her. She left anyways, just because she had an idea of what they would be talking about whether or not she was there… and it would be quite a bit less awkward if she wasn't there.

"Ok, so what now?" Jack said, completely oblivious. The Doctor sat in a chair, his usual theatrical flair dominating the motion.

"Now we talk about River." He said, folding his arms.

"Oh, no." Jack winced.

"Oh, yes."

"She told you?" The Doctor shrugged.

"More or less." He tapped his temple. "Time Lord, remember? She sort of thought it to me. You really scared her." Jack held up his hands in a surrendering motion.

"Doctor, I swear-" The Doctor wouldn't hear it. He was a pretty jealous man, truth be told, and though he knew (and could handle) River loved teasing him, he couldn't take someone else trying to take her from him.

"That technology is mildly telepathic, did you know that? It taps into your brain and suppresses your conscious mind, all while using all the information in your subconscious to impersonate you as you would seem. Of course, they're really doing the controlling, they're just trying to make it look like you. They don't take into account not everyone gives into every desire in the subconscious mind."

"Doctor, please-"

"You can't expect me to be ok with this, can you?" The Doctor stood.

"You know I wouldn't-"

"You have feelings for my wife, Jack, how am I supposed to deal with that?" Both stood silently face to face for a moment.

"I can't help what I did. You know that." The Doctor sighed. Jack was right in this case. "It doesn't change my feelings for or about her that you're married. But you can I both know that I would never act on them, and we also know that she doesn't want me, she wants you." After a moment the Doctor nodded. "Are we good?"

"Yeah. We're good." The Doctor said, and shook his hand, smiling despite himself. "So… let's go find a time-space breach." The went off down the hall, where they found the others waiting for them next to the TARDIS. Everyone piled inside and the Doctor and River flew them to New York City.

However, something went wrong. The TARDIS shook and lurched more than usual, and made noises even with the handbrake off. When they landed everyone was catapulted to the floor and smoke streamed from the console. TARDIS smoke doesn't smell like burning things- it smells like ozone. Like _time_ burning. The coughing group bustled out the doors, the Doctor joining them a moment later with the status.

"Just some minor repair work. Shouldn't take more than a five or six hours."

"That's minor?" Asked Amy.

"For him? Yes." River said.

"Can we still communicate with Rose?" Asked Gwen. The Doctor nodded.

"Yeah, the scanner's working fine, she just won't go into flight."

"So what do we do if we find it?" Mickey asked. This brought about a little bickering until the Doctor finally settled it.

"Tell you what, I'll stay here with the TARDIS, and when you find it contact me with your communicator things, and I'll call Rose." That seemed to work for everyone. The Doctor gave River his sonic, stating he would do repairs after everything settles down. They broke off into teams of two and divided the city into 4 sectors by direction- North, South, East, West. Amy and Rory went West, Martha and Mickey South, Gwen and Luke North, and River and Jack East. Keep in mind, they were parked who knows where in the heart of New York. Anything could be anywhere from where they were.

After walking a couple of miles and picking up nearly nothing, Jack and River saw a slight increase in saturation on their tracking devices.

"Did you see that?" Jack asked. River nodded.

"You bet." They found the direction it was coming from and ran towards the source, which was becoming stronger with every step. Then suddenly the saturation went down.

"Wait, back up!" Jack said. They looked around, but saw nothing. A second later River pointed up, craning her neck skyward.

"Um, Jack? I think I found it." Far above their heads was a shimmering silver… well, _crack_ in the air. How on earth they were going to get up there, River had no idea. The TARDIS wasn't able to fly. She called the Doctor to report it, anyways, and the others were supposed to be coming to their location. According to Rose they had fifteen minutes to throw in the device and close the breach. River looked around. She had no idea where they were… but maybe she didn't need to know. Spinning around, she ran inside one of the most well-known buildings in the country, and one that had a fantastic view: the Rockefeller Center.

"What are you doing?" Jack asked. She sonicked the elevator and motioned for Jack to come quickly. They weren't very busy today.

"We're going to get a better look at that breach." They stepped out at the top of the building after a minute or two. The view was amazing- you could see the entire city from the top. Only then did it hit them how high they were. River stepped out to the platform on the roof, which was lined with glass panels. "This won't work."

"Why not?" They were literally fifteen feet from the breach, and tourists and locals alike were snapping pictures and staring. Jack could feel it pulling him towards it from all the Rift energy he constantly soaked up.

"We need to get higher. These panels are in the way." River said, and higher they did. After slipping past a couple guards they found a back staircase that led to the roof, and came out to stand on the windy top of the building, looking down at the breach from 50 feet up. Checking his watch, Jack could see that they had five minutes left.

"Ok, so what now? Throw it down?" He asked. It was a ways from the side of the building.

"No, too risky. We need something close that can aim it in." She paced a little. Something like… like a person.

"We need the TARDIS!" Jack said. "It's a time machine, can't he just go back and fly it?" River shook her head.

"Runs too close to crossing his own time stream. We don't need a paradox, too." She thought for a second, wondering where the Doctor was. "They're on their way up, yeah?" A plan was starting to form.

"Should be by now. Why?" All of a sudden River took off towards the edge of the roof, but Jack grabbed her and held her fast after about five steps.

"What are you doing? Are you insane?" He asked.

"Probably so! Don't you know that by now?"

"You'll be sucked into the void, River!" Jack said, attempting to hold her back.

"If I don't go the breach will only get bigger and this whole world's going to be sucked in!" She struggled forward. "Besides, I'm not going to get close enough! Rose said the stuff wears off in time- it's been fifteen years for me!"

"Let me go! I'll survive the fall!" He said.

"No! You'll get pulled in much more easily than I will. You have a future you have to fulfill, I don't anymore!" She jerked out of his grasp and turned back to face him. "No more running. No more hiding behind paradoxes." She backed towards the edge.

"No! I won't let you do this!" He said. She shook her head.

"You have to. The TARDIS is broken- we don't have a choice."

"But-"

"No. Tell the Doctor I'm sorry." She pressed the sonic into Jack's hands, ran towards the ledge, took a deep breath, and jumped.

The Doctor arrived just in time to see her do so.

"RIVER, NO!" He ran across the roof towards Jack, Amy and Rory hot on his heels. Honestly, the gravel probably would have caused him to slide off the roof himself if it wasn't for Jack knocking him to the ground.

"Jack, what are you doing? You can't just-" He pinned him down until he stopped struggling.

"Doctor, it's been done!" It took all of Jack's strength not to follow her himself. After a moment Amy and Rory called them over.

"Doctor! Come quick!" The foursome gazed over the side of the roof. The shimmering spot in the air that marked the position of the breach was gone, and so was River. Tears were in everyone's eyes, but they were too brave to shed them. On the other hand, maybe they weren't brave enough.

"Well." Jack said, swallowing hard. "I think we should get back." The Doctor didn't say a word the entire way back. Once inside the TARDIS he holed himself up underneath the glass, making the necessary repairs so she could fly again.

"I don't understand." Amy said, standing beside where he was working. He'd agreed to let them stay for a short while. "Why was she pulled in? Rose said the stuff wears off in time- it shouldn't have affected her…" The Doctor was still silent. Amy supposed that he was having a rougher time dealing with it because the reality wasn't quite so harsh for them yet, what with backwards timelines and all. She walked silently off to bed, holding Rory's hand in hers.

What Amy didn't know was that the Doctor would dream about this for the rest of his life. Twice. Twice he'd let her die… he could still see her in that chair, see the flash of light, and through it he could see her disintegrating. Somewhere deep down he probably knew she didn't have a choice- if he had died then she might never have been born- but he still blamed himself. He could have saved her- very early on he could rewrite everything so she would live happily with Amy and Rory… but he was too late. He'd been too selfish, too _stupid_ to do that when he could. Almost a paradox in itself, he thought- he loved her too much to save her life. But what are you to do when she's been sucked into the void? If she'd simply jumped off the building he could have-

But wait.

Just a chance, just a very small chance… but worth a shot. He set the coordinates and flew the TARDIS as quietly as possible to her destination. She obliged, possibly because he'd taken off the handbrake, or because she knew what he was thinking. Making sure the gravity was on, he ran to the doors and threw them open, finding that he was looking up a very tall building. The Doctor barely had a second to register which building it was before something crashed into him.

No, not something- someone.

The gravity in the TARDIS kicked on and pulled River sideways and downwards, both at once but really only one direction. Her perception was distorted for a moment, but when the dizziness subsided she found that she was lying on top of the Doctor on the floor of the TARDIS. He opened his eyes slowly, hands tracing her form like a child groping in the dark. The TARDIS put herself into flight.

"River." He seemed utterly amazed to her, but in reality he was simply trying to hold back the flood of emotion coming over him. "I thought I lost you." She smiled despite herself.

"You always catch me."

"You wouldn't-"

"You _always_ catch me."

"I-" She pressed a finger to his lips to silence him.

"Always." She constantly amazed him with how strong and confident she was. He'd only ever seen her cry five, maybe six times- three of which had been since her return from the Library. It had to be hard adjusting to a new body. One of those was from joy upon her return. Two were from his own, or rather his ganger's murder. One was from her death and the fact he didn't know her yet. The others were a bit fuzzy just now. They got to their feet slowly.

"You know, I'm really feeling like this is one of those moments where if the roles were reversed, you'd slap me." The Doctor said. River started to open her mouth, but he shut her up by kissing her.

"I like your methods better." She said, then returned the kiss gladly. One of his hands tangled in her hair and the other arm was around her waist, pulling her closer. She held his face in her hands and was thinking of removing his jacket when she heard footsteps.

"Doctor, I-" a very astonished Rory was cut off mid-sentence. "But… you… she… building… how?" The Doctor sighed.

"Why do your parents always seem to interrupt us?" River laughed and Rory thre his hands up in defeat.

"I'll never understand you two."

"And we're perfectly ok with that." River said.

**_I find I have a very bad habit of posting new chapters after midnight and then waking up hoping for reviews from people in other time zones. :) Please review!_**


	5. The Night is Misting Stars

_Alright, I've edited the previous chapters in order for it to stay consistent with the Whoniverse. You may want to go back and reread Chapter 1 to see the minor changes. The story can now continue and my angst-reading fanfic mind can be eased. This is just some short drabble to get the story rolling again in the next chapter, and to say "Hello, readers, I'm back!" Also, I've been reading so much angst lately that my shipper heart is breaking to bits, and writing this is the only way to ease it for me._

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><p>River lay with her back to the cool earth, gazing up at the stars. The eerie perfume sweetness of the flora on this planet wafted to her nose, and she breathed deeply, drinking in the smell. Being alone under the night sky was always the best time for contemplation. Perhaps she'd developed the habit when she was in Stormcage, where there was no sky, so that she'd avoid contemplating anything behind those blue-lit cell bars. It was dangerous to oneself to think alone for too long.<p>

However, she needed to be alone at this moment.

Amy and Rory were asleep, and the Doctor was off doing who knows what somewhere in the far reaches of the TARDIS, so she'd taken the old girl for a short, silent trip. This planet was one of her favorites- it was peaceful at night, unlike many worlds where the shadows drifted like disembodied souls across an empty horizon, never quite determined to go anywhere, and yet drifting towards everywhere at once under the pale light of the stars. There was a moon out tonight. Well, actually there were three moons out, though only one was full. The other two were only at the first and third quarters, and River was unable to tell whether they were waxing or waning.

"Oh, love." River mumbled to herself. "I never thought I'd see these stars again." She looked up at the billions upon billions of twinkling lights, like liquid gold and silver, burning bright and lighting up the black as a candle lights a room, with warmth and comfort that gives a depth to the cold blackness. Soft footsteps interrupted her thoughts.

"Stargazing again?" Asked the Doctor, taking a seat beside her. He knew every star, and as pretty as the sight was he'd never found it as calming or comforting as River did.

"Just for a bit."

"What is it this time?" The Doctor asked, but he was met with only silence. "No spoilers, remember? I know you only come out here alone when you're upset."

"I was just thinking about… Berlin. And Silencio."

"Oh, not that again." The Doctor said, flopping onto his back beside her. "I think about Berlin every single day, River, and Lake Silencio, too, but not for the same reasons you do."

"My love, I-" The Doctor put a finger to her lips.

"Shh. See? That's why I think about them. You still loved me even when you'd been trained to kill me. I still can't figure out why…" He trailed off, and rather than answer, River found a new statement.

"I still killed you."

"That doesn't matter." He said. "You saved me, too, in so many ways."

"I never-" River began, but then stopped herself, knowing how he would respond.

"You did. And now look at us- we finally have something we never thought we would- time."

"Time for the Time Lords." River said, chuckling. "I should be so happy about this. Getting to spend forever with you, my Doctor, my husband, my love… I just don't want it to end the way we thought it was going to. I guess it hasn't soaked in that's it's real."

"Trust me this time. It _is_ real." The Doctor sighed, and River leaned her head against his chest. "You know, sometimes I wonder if I deserve that title." He said.

"What title? The Doctor?" She asked, slightly confused.

"No. I _know_ I don't deserve that one." He said, taking her hand gently.

"Then what title _are_ you talking about? There's quite a list, you know." River said. The Doctor pressed the back of her hand to his lips and closed his eyes for a moment before responding, thinking of the one word that meant so much to him, both a name and something more, but he would never feel he deserved after the many terrible things and blood strewn worlds he'd encountered.

"Love."


End file.
